One post I read from the Friendship Page Advice Forum was about a girl who was feeling left out from two of her friends.
Her long time friend, has started to spend more time with another girl, and they all three hang out but neglect the needs of the girl with the problem. She explains how they made plans without telling her and didn't show any remorse when they finally told her they went. She also said she feels excluded whenever she is around them, and that they don't even want her around. One of the commenters explained that she should give it some time, and show them she is a true friend. If they don't come around than she should just walk away.
This story relates to the Waning Friendship section of chapter 10. Friends can drift apart physically, but also because one person becomes bored or is unhappy in the friendship. Most of the time the friendship will fade slowly, rather than abruptly. When any of these changes happen in a friendship, the person on the outside can become defensive and uncertain, almost insecure with the relationship. This sounds a lot like what the girl on the advice forum was going through. In order to revive the friendship, both people must be rebuilding the trust and intimacy that comes with a close friendship.
Great Post! It must be hard on the girl to get sort of booted out of her group of friends without any notice at all. I kind of wonder what is the other side of that story and why did her LONG time friends replaced her. It definitely is a situation where the friendship has been waned, although, as you stated, it usually does not happen as abruptly. I agree with the advice that was given to her in the forum, giving the situation sometime may help her get her friends back. The advice I would have given her would have been to be upfront with her group of friends and try to figure out what went wrong. It doesn't make any sense to waste too much time thinking about why and becoming more defensive and insecure in that scenario!
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