I have learned many different things about communication from this class, but most importantly I have learned how to see situations from others perspectives, and analyze why they are acting the way they are.
The book explains how men and women think about communication differently, and this really changed my perspective when thinking about conversations between myself and my fiance. Women tend to be more likely to talk through their problems and show emotions, while men like to stay factual and are not so expressive. I notice that whenever Erik and I have a conversation we both feel passionately about, he talks longer to express his thoughts while I blurt out my feelings and express every emotion. I think one of the biggest things I took away from this section of the book is to realize and understand that everyone is different, and just because they don't react the same way you do in situations, it doesn't mean they are wrong.
The other thing I really appreciated learning from this book was about engaging in dual perspective. This is when we understand both our own feelings, as well as another person's perspectives, beliefs, thoughts or feelings. This allows us to understand and respect someone else's feelings on a situation or topic, going along with the theme of accepting differences among others. Once you are able to do this, you can really begin to know someone and not be so selfish in conversations. You wont only be worrying about expressing your own perspective, you will want to listen to the other person and try to understand theirs as well.
Dear MaryLou,
ReplyDeleteI also have to agree with you that dual perspectives and imagining the other perspective can help our communication grow. It is important to know about the surroundings a person is involved in, so that they may learn how to survive and be the ally and not the enemy. I also believe that this lesson is one of the most important lessons this book has to offer. When we communicate with others, we do not think of others as we have so many thoughts that are running through our minds, and it is overwhelming to even consider what someone else thinks. Even though it may be overwhelming, it makes us feel a sense of belonging if they accept us for trying to add their thoughts into our minds when we communicate, and that makes good relationships and friendships.
Thanks for sharing! I enjoyed reading your posts! Have a good year!! :D
Jeff!